50 Inspiring Quotes from Alan Watts
Quotes, Alan Watts, beautiful, Inspiring, life, meaningful, motivation, quotes
Fri, 23 Jan 2015 05:32:10 +0000
There are times in our lives when we face hardships that seem impossible to overcome; times when we feel like just stopping and giving up — seeing no reason to go on. It is during those times that we need a bit of inspiration. So we can be thankful for the wonderful gift of life and that, despite the trials, there are always reasons for us to keep moving forward. When you find yourself in need of a jolt to keep going, here are some inspiring quotes by Alan Watts to draw some strength from and understand life along with yourself: To have faith is to trust yourself to the water. When you swim you don’t grab hold of the water, because if you do you will sink and drown. Instead you relax, and float. There will always be suffering. But we must not suffer over the suffering. Muddy water is best cleared by leaving it alone. The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance. But I’ll tell you what hermits realize. If you go off into a far, far forest and get very quiet, you’ll come to understand that you’re connected with everything. Things are as they are. Looking out into it the universe at night, we make no comparisons between right and wrong stars, nor between well and badly arranged constellations. You and I are all as much continuous with the physical universe as a wave is continuous with the ocean. We cannot be more sensitive to pleasure without being more sensitive to pain. What the devil is the point of surviving, going on living, when it’s a drag? But you see, that’s what people do. No valid plans for the future can be made by those who have no capacity for living now. I have realized that the past and future are real illusions, that they exist in the present, which is what there is and all there is. This is the real secret of life — to be completely engaged with what you are doing in the here and now. And instead of calling it work, realize it is play. Life exists only at this very moment, and in this moment it is infinite and eternal, for the present moment is infinitely small; before we can measure it, it has gone, and yet it exists forever…. When you get free from certain fixed concepts of the way the world is, you find it is far more subtle, and far more miraculous, than you thought it was. If you really understand Zen… you can use any book. You could use the Bible. You could use Alice in Wonderland. You could use the dictionary, because… the sound of the rain needs no translation. Only words and conventions can isolate us from the entirely undefinable something which is everything. Meditation is the discovery that the point of life is always arrived at in the immediate moment. The sense of wrong is simply failure to see where something fits into a pattern, to be confused as to the hierarchical level upon which an event belongs. The only Zen you’ll find on mountain tops is the Zen you bring up there with you. You didn’t come into this world. You came out of it, like a wave from the ocean. You are not a stranger here. To be free from convention is not to spurn it but not to be deceived by it. The more we struggle for life (as pleasure), the more we are actually killing what we love. Everyone has love, but it can only come out when he is convinced of the impossibility and the frustration of trying to love himself. Parts exist only for purposes of figuring and describing, and as we figure the world out we become confused if we do not remember this all the time. Every individual is a unique manifestation of the Whole, as every branch is a particular outreaching of the tree. Life and love generate effort, but effort will not generate them. Faith—in life, in other people, and in oneself—is the attitude of allowing the spontaneous to be spontaneous, in its own way and in its own time. What you are basically, deep, deep down, far, far in, is simply the fabric and structure of existence itself. There is no formula for generating the authentic warmth of love. It cannot be copied. The problem comes up because we ask the question in the wrong way. We supposed that solids were one thing and space quite another, or just nothing whatever. Then it appeared that space was no mere nothing, because solids couldn’t do without it. But the mistake in the beginning was to think of solids and space as two different things, instead of as two aspects of the same thing. The point is that they are different but inseparable, like the front end and the rear end of a cat. Cut them apart, and the cat dies. Total situations are, therefore, patterns in time as much as patterns in space. There was never a time when the world began, because it goes round and round like a circle, and there is no place on a circle where it begins. Look at my watch, which tells the time; it goes round, and so the world repeats itself again and again. There is always something taboo, something repressed, unadmitted, or just glimpsed quickly out of the corner of one’s eye because a direct look is too unsettling. Taboos lie within taboos, like the skin of an onion. We do not “come into” this world; we come out of it, as leaves from a tree. As the ocean “waves,” the universe “peoples.” The meaning of life is just to be alive. It is so plain and so obvious and so simple. And yet, everybody rushes around in a great panic as if it were necessary to achieve something beyond themselves. Problems that remain persistently insoluble should always be suspected as questions asked in the wrong way. To put is still more plainly: the desire for security and the feeling of insecurity are the same thing. To hold your breath is to lose your breath. If you say that getting the money is the most important thing, you’ll spend your life completely wasting your time. You’ll be doing things you don’t like doing in order to go on living, that is to go on doing things you don’t like doing, which is stupid. But the attitude of faith is to let go, and become open to truth, whatever it might turn out to be. You are a function of what the whole universe is doing in the same way that a wave is a function of what the whole ocean is doing. The menu is not the meal. We seldom realize, for example, that our most private thoughts and emotions are not actually our own. For we think in terms of languages and images which we did not invent, but which were given to us by our society. What I am really saying is that you don’t need to do anything, because if you see yourself in the correct way, you are all as much extraordinary phenomenon of nature as trees, clouds, the patterns in running water, the flickering of fire, the arrangement of the stars, and the form of a galaxy. You are all just like that, and there is nothing wrong with you at all. You are the big bang, the original force of the universe, coming on as whoever you are. A society based on the quest for security is nothing but a breath-retention contest in which everyone is as taut as a drum and as purple as a beet. The greater part of human activity is designed to make permanent those experiences and joys which are only lovable because they are changing. Your body does not eliminate poisons by knowing their names. To try to control fear or depression or boredom by calling them names is to resort to superstition of trust in curses and invocations. It is so easy to see why this does not work. Obviously, we try to know, name, and define fear in order to make it “objective,” that is, separate from “I.” Philosophy is man’s expression of curiosity about everything and his attempt to make sense of the world primarily through his intellect. Try to imagine what it will be like to go to sleep and never wake up… now try to imagine what it was like to wake up having never gone to sleep. How is it possible that a being with such sensitive jewels as the eyes, such enchanted musical instruments as the ears, and such fabulous arabesque of nerves as the brain can experience itself anything less than a god. Parts exist only for purposes of figuring and describing, and as we figure the world out we become confused if we do not remember this all the time.
20 Simple Secrets to Taking Better Photos
Photography, How-To, methods, secrets, simple, Tips, tricks
Thu, 22 Jan 2015 05:08:40 +0000
Whether you are using an expensive camera, which does not guarantee good pictures, or using your camera on your phone, there are a few things you should keep in mind when taking pictures. To take good pictures you do not need to be a professional either. It is all in how you view the world and the things in it. It is the moments that make pictures great! As a general rule there are 20 guidelines you should follow that can change the way you picture the world right away. 1. Get in good and close. If you think your pictures do not stand out or create the feeling you are looking for, take a few steps closer and get into the action. A nice close up can make a picture pop. 2. Practice or shoot daily. Make sure that you spend a few moments every day to practice the tips provided. Make sure you have your camera on you at all times so you do miss a moment. 3. Use the light to your advantage. Don’t take pictures with the sun behind you as most people think. It tends to flatten your picture. However you need to make sure your subjects are facing the light to brighten the picture. To accomplish this use a flash during the day to brighten the mood whenever natural light isn’t sufficient. If you are in a stadium, gymnasium or a museum the only way to get a better picture is to turn off your flash and change your ISO to a higher setting to allow more natural light into the lens. 4. Read your camera or phone manual that describes the camera settings. Knowing how your camera functions is a vital part to taking pictures. Knowing what your camera will and will not do is important for the kind of pictures you want to take. There are also a lot of features that can enhance your photos. 5. Clean your lens. Making sure that soft dirt, dust, and debris are cleared off the lens will keep you from having to discard wonderful pictures you’ve captured. 6. Shoot the moment. Don’t take pictures for the sake of taking pictures. Life is a series of moments. And those moments make excellent pictures. 7. Move around. Pictures do not have to be taken from the same angle. Take shots in the moment by moving around and taking pictures from different perspectives. The change in scenery will amaze you! 8. Focus, focus, focus. Your camera will automatically focus either on what is in the center of the frame or on the object that is closest to the lens. To take amazing pictures you determine what your focus will be. 9. Frame it up! Look for natural frames for your pictures. You can use archways, door frames two trees or anything in a natural landscape. It is a simple technique that draws the focus back to your subject. 10. What’s so funny? A properly timed joke or funny can enhance a photo opportunity. 11. Save a photo by going black and white. At times, you can have a photo that has bad lighting and poor coloring but a wonderful setting and perfect subject matter. Why not convert that picture into black and white? Your camera or phone often will have filters that allow you to recolor a photo. Another way to salvage a photo is to crop out the bad stuff and keep the good. 12. Be in the moment. Don’t be afraid to follow your subject. Get down to eyelevel and bring the camera up and around the subject. Don’t feel like head on is the only way to photograph your subject. 13. Slow down and shoot with your mind. Don’t be afraid to take your time. Notice expressions and gestures. Pay attention to all the details. There may be something you don’t want to miss. 14. KISS your pictures. Keep It Simple Stupid. Too much clutter or elements in a picture will keep people from focusing on your subject. So keep things simple. 15. Don’t buy unnecessary photography equipment. If you want to spend money, you should buy books to give you inspiration and to show you fresh techniques. Too many extras just gets confusing. Keep your equipment small and easy to handle. 16. The rule of thirds. Cut your frame in thirds both horizontally and vertically. A lot of cameras and phones will do this with the boxes that appear on your screen. Make sure to localize your subject in the grid. 17. Get comfortable. Both you and your subjects should be comfortable. You should be accustomed to the feel and the weight of you camera as well as being able to hold it steady. Cameras and phones come with a stability setting and it is a good idea to use it. Your subject should be comfortable as well to keep photos looking natural and not posed. 18. Dusk to dawn. A good time to shoot pictures is at dusk or dawn. The colors are more vibrant and softer. 19. Take out the light. If you cannot get a good picture in the light move to the shade and use a flash. The shade can be a good friend. 20. Finally, be patient, persevere, and break the rules. You will get better over the course of time if you stick with it. Be sure to think out of the box and bend the rules when looking for subject matter and inspiration for beautiful photos. Your moment can be anywhere.
30 Must-Have Fonts for 2015
Shop, 2015, beautiful, best, download, Fonts, typography
Wed, 21 Jan 2015 05:45:05 +0000
To some people, typography may seem like a small thing. But when you’re serious about your aesthetic appearance, typography has a great impact on what you’re spelling out with your words. Typography is the style or appearance of any printed matter and the fonts you choose have an impact on the message you are sending. In our daily conversations, we speak with different tones and inflections. But we obviously can’t do that for the text we post online or print on paper. This is where your choice of font comes in! There are thousands of fonts to choose from and all of these fonts add charm and appeal to your written text. Why stop at just typing out a string of words when you can add some personality to it by choosing fonts to match the text? With the right kind of font, you can send out your vibes as if you’re being loud, excited, formal, cheerful, playful, or pretty much every other emotion. As long as you choose the matching font for the message, you’ll be able to get your message across in a more stylish and visually appealing way. You can make a better first impression with the text you want your readers to see when you choose the right fonts for your titles, subheadings, and the body of your content. With the right fonts, you can draw their eyes to the parts of your message that you want them to focus on. This year, knowing which fonts you can download online to make your text presentations or other printed materials can make a huge difference in how you reach out to people. May it be serif font faces or sans serif styles, you can find charming fonts you can use for your cards, websites, blogs—pretty much anywhere you need lovely typefaces to go. You can choose from cursive styles, all capital letters, funky font faces, or even seemingly handwritten fonts to give more personality to your text. The difference it will make for your readers will be something worth noting! Be prepared to hear exclamations like “Oh, this is so cute!” when you use some of the best and most charming fonts online. Here are 30 premium fonts to make your next design look extra special: Againts Againts Typeface was inspired from ink & tints manual handdrawn brush to make a natural messy, with alternate glyphs in some character of type could you make a stylish design, and extra Ligature could help to good display, uses for labeling, clothing, movie scenes, film titles, gigs, or cover albums. Trend Rough Trend , Trend Hand Made & Trend Rough is a font made of layers, taking as a basis a sans and a slab font. It is the result of observation, search and study of the last global trends. Trend tries to capture the aesthetics of fashion or even fashion itself, integrating elements of a very popular and current trend. Shoebox Shoebox is crafty and sweet. It’s hand-drawn with double letter ligatures for upper and lower case. It works great in all-cap, and the lower case is a funky mix up with some interlocking ligatures too. Mairy Mairy font family is a modern sans serif font family. Featuring 9 separate weights each followed by own true italics. Mairy is positioned somewhere between rounded sans with humanist touch. It’s a very fresh font family and is surprisingly flexible when it comes to screen or print use. Sica The Sica Family was designed in order to address issues related to technology. Square shaped it has smooth curves and slightly rounded terminals making it friendly. The family has three widths – condensed, normal and expanded – each of them with six weights and their respective italics, resulting in 36 fonts. Vivala Black The idea behind Vivala Black was to create a unicase typeface with a high black ratio that supports a compact typographic style. The four widths of Vivala Black share similar metrics, so they can be easily interchanged in a body of the text. Opentype features are ligatures, fractions, ordinals, numerators, denominators and stylistic alternates. Fields of application are posters, magazines, packaging design, books up to corporate design. Prada Prada is bold, classic, and fun vintage script. This font was designed to suited as headlines, signage, poster, logo, badge, and emblem. Badmood Badmood is a hand-lettered script font for multipurpose usage: poster, advertisement, wedding invitation, greeting card, branding, t-shirt design, etc.It contains 237 glyphs in total and 60 alternative characters to play with. Mix and match the alternative characters in Badmood to create an attractive message or a hand-made content. Ilya-FY With its soft and triangular serifs and its round shapes, Ilya FY is a friendly and gentle display font. Its tall ascendants and descendants, single storey a, generous uppercases and other nice details give Ilya FY a singular look if you need a fresh and original typographic friend for your posters, signage, headlines and logotypes. Showcase Showcase is a handmade font consisting of a set of types that are composed of four styles, one script, one sans, a slab, sans mini and finally a set of ornaments and dingbats, all made to work together in the same language. It’s inspired by a pen that writes different typefaces and ornaments, and casually reaches into a harmonious family. Showcase is very easy to use and allows great versatility, can be used both in a magazine as a restaurant, through windows, cafes, and really anyway you can think of! Nexa Rust Nexa Rust is a multifaceted font system consisting of font sub-families Sans, Slab, Script, Handmade and Extras. Each of these sub-families contains a number of font weights which have a characteristic warm, rough look and display a few degrees of saturation. Getone Getone is an exotic font with a modern touch. All the glyphs are designed “out of the box” to combine each other in harmonious way. Getone is coming in ten styles : thin, ultra light, light, regular, bold and italics. Is ideally suited for advertising and packaging, festive occasions, editorial and publishing, logo, branding and creative industries, poster and billboards as well as web and screen design. Steady Steady is a script typeface with personality. It was designed as a display typeface that contains 315 glyphs in total and 126 alternative characters to improve your design. You can use it as a logo, badge, insignia, packaging, headline, poster, t-shirt/apparel, greeting card, and wedding invitation. Classification Classification’s attractive sans design was found as a hand-lettered title on a piece of vintage sheet music called “My Hawaiian Souvenirs”. During the 1940s, the popular mode of travel to other countries was by steamship. Steamship passengers were assigned their accommodations by the type of passage they booked (such as First Class and Tourist), thus they were in various levels of classification. Nephrite Nephrite is a clean and soft family of 14 styles, 7 weights and italics. Recommended for text, magazine, book, logo and brandings. Crereal Cereal is a font family designed by Carlos Fabian Camargo. Its 8 fonts work in groups or independent. All are designed for composition of words and phrases that need to communicate warm and craft climate. Due to its high imaginative content it is useful in designing book covers, cards, logos, posters, wedding invitations, stamps, etc. Geogrotesque Geogrotesque is a semi modular with a subtle rounded finish typeface. All the characters are based in the same formal principle with its corresponding optical adjustments in order to adapt the system to an alphabet for texts. Geogrotesque has been conceived to be used as a display typeface in publications or intermediate length texts, most of all the Thin and Ultralight weights which were meant to be used in big sizes. WildFire WildFire is a humble all-caps, display, and san-serif font. It works for all kinds of projects, and has some cool surprise features when you switch to uppercase. The rounded corners give it a warm, friendly way about it. Works extremely well for badges, logos and type based design. Conifer Conifer is a blocky geometric sans serif font that adheres to strict grid rules in order to define its corner angles. Its seemingly rigid form is tempered by the soft, rounded corners, and fine notched details present at acute angles in the glyphs. The result is a rugged, retro, typeface that is at home in fashion lookbooks and wood-carved park signage alike. Burford Burford is a beautiful layer-based font. The package comes with all 18 layering fonts including 5 base layers, 3 top layers, 5 bottom layers and 2 sets of graphic elements. They are strategically made to build on top of each other, creating a cohesive and easy to use layer-based family. The Burford Extras set uses all basic keyboard characters – around 100 total elements per set. They are designed to go specifically with Burford and complement its varying styles perfectly. The set includes: banners, borders, corners, arrows, line breaks, catchwords, anchors and many more! Aria Pro The inspiration for this typeface came from the epigraph on a frame of a nineteenth century painting. The designer was fascinated by the peculiar capitals of the inscription, leading him to capture the spirit of the original letters, which were imbued with Romanticism. Erazm Erazm was inspired by books from the 30’s from Poland. From a few letters Ithe artist created an entire typeface – lower and uppercase characters. Spumante A slim, semi-connected script with lithely upright curves, Spumante conveys the casual effervescence of its namesake wine. Smoothed brush-script letterforms bounce gently along the baseline, and letters vary slightly in their slant— characteristics that combine to create a very human and inviting mood. Panton The Panton font family includes 34 weights – 9 uprights with 9 italics and 16 icon sets as a bonus. Inspired by the classic grotesque typefaces, Panton is most suitable for headlines of all sizes, as well as for text blocks that come in both maximum and minimum variations. Artsy Brush Artsy Brush was inspired from ink & tints manual handdrawn brush to make a natural messy could help to good display, uses for labeling, clothing, movie sceen, band logo,film title, gigs, or cover album. It comes with 246 characters included Uppercase, Lowercase, Numbers, Punctuations, Currency, and Accents. Galano Classic Galano Classicpays tribute to the past, characterized by a moderate x-height and details like the long stretched leg of uppercase “R”, as well as the traditional shaped lowercase “g”, to mention only a few. It comes in 10 different weights with matching italics containing 555 glyphs per font. It feels great in small sizes and long text passages, too. Brandon Grotesque Brandon Grotesque is a sans serif type family of six weights plus matching italics. It was influenced by the geometric-style sans serif faces that were popular during the 1920s and 30s, the fonts are based on geometric forms that have been optically corrected for better legibility. Brandon Grotesque has a functional look with a warm touch. While the thin and the black weights are great performers in display sizes the light, regular and medium weights are well suited to longer texts. The small x-height and the restrained forms lend it a distinctive elegance. Manhattan Darling Manhattan Darling Typeface was created as a dual-purpose font, with gritty, imperfect, hand-painted characters and an irregular baseline. Use the uppercase portion to create a bold, organic hand-painted typography, or use the lowercase portion for beautiful branding, logo designs, invitations, wedding elements, etc. Glober The Glober font family includes 18 weights – nine uprights with nine italics. It is characterized by excellent legibility in both – web & print design areas, well-finished geometric designs, optimized kerning, excellent web-font performance and legibility etc. Glober font styles are applicable for any type of graphic design in web, print, motion graphics etc and perfect for t-shirts and other items like posters, logos. Venti Venti is a geometric font family with a warm, readable character. Inviting and versatile, Venti’s engaging form, subtle imperfections and human tone make it an enticing choice for headlines, quotations and short texts.
How to Put Office Haters in their Proper Place
Business, attitude, co-workers, haters, How-To, office, problems
Tue, 20 Jan 2015 05:57:04 +0000
It has been said that people who go to the office every day spend far more time with their colleagues than with their families. If this is true, then conflict is bound to happen. Families don’t get along at all times, and neither do co-workers. But while slamming the door or doing the silent treatment works at home, these tactics are unprofessional and obnoxious, even if you’re dealing with a co-worker whose attitude leaves a lot to be desired. One prevalent office problem is dealing with haters or trolls. These are people that no matter what you do or how well you do your work, they can still find something to complain about. “Haters gonna hate.” Often, these haters are the people who are jealous of you. They’re jealous of your success, how you carry yourself, even the things you own. But they deny their jealousy and strike back by spreading negative things about you. And even if you’re the most professional person in your company or you have thick skin, sometimes, haters hit you where it hurts the most like dragging your family to their bitter world. If you’re dealing with office haters, here are six tips on how to effectively deal with the office’s version of the “mean girls.” Ignore the haters. This is easier said than done, but it truly is a tried and tested way to handle haters. Don’t waste your time giving these bitter people what they crave for, which is to see you crumbling down from their negativity. If you obsess about each comment or gossip, you may feel that there’s truth in all the detrimental things they say. Don’t twist yourself up just because someone in the office hates your guts. As long as you do your job well, you don’t walk over people, steal ideas or take credit that isn’t yours, then you’re fine. Don’t let the haters’ negativity ruin your day. Take their “feedback” with a grain of salt. There will be moments when you may have difficulty differentiating constructive criticism from a snarky attack disguised as a critique. Sometimes there can be a shade of truth in their feedback. If this is the situation, make a note of what haters have to say but don’t take their “feedback” to heart. If you believe you’ll be able to improve your work because of their critique, then good for you. Just try not to carry the emotional baggage attached to their comment. Don’t wreak vengeance. This isn’t high school. Retaliation will just compound the problem. What haters love to do is to provoke you to retaliate or at least talk back. They’re hankering for a reaction, otherwise they wouldn’t feel that they’ve done what they do best – hate. If you strike back, you’re giving the trolls what they desire. It can be tempting, but don’t waste your witty comebacks to shut them up. Since people around you know what’s going on, in reality, it’s their reputations that are being ruined, not yours. Besides, haters normally manage to humiliate themselves with no help from others. Reacting with unpleasant remarks will just bring you down to their level. Don’t be intimidated. Even if you’re dealing with a hater that’s unfortunately your boss, don’t let your superior intimidate you. Don’t be bullied to the point that you feel you need to apologize or justify your actions all the time. Even if the hater confronts you with a loud voice, big gestures and crude words, asking for you to explain yourself, don’t succumb to the pressure. Instead, calmly tell the hater that if s/he wants an explanation from you, s/he better approach you the right way. Superior or not, never let another person disrespect you. You can’t please everybody so stop trying. Haters will hate you whatever you do. Even if you’re the kindest person in the office, they still have something to say about you. Never appease trolls by trying to fit in to their bitter world. It won’t matter. You can’t please everybody and that’s okay. The quicker you accept that fact, the easier it is for you to calmly breathe at work. You don’t need everybody’s approval anyway. Seek legal help. If the hating comes to a point that it turns physical or violent threats are involved, then the passive-aggressive strategy wouldn’t fly anymore. In this case, asking help from the company’s Human Resource department is the right thing to do. As much as you can, don’t retaliate. Instead, make a note about the situation – what triggers it, where it happens, are there any other people involved, and so on. This way, when the situation gets out of hand, you’ll have records of the attack. Some say haters are the way they are because, deep inside, they’re insecure or broken. Regardless if there is any truth to that or not, show compassion. Be the better person. But know when to draw the line also. So how do you put haters in their proper place? By making sure that though they exist in your life, they don’t live there.
50 Inspirational and Interesting Shower Thoughts to Make You Say Hmmm…
Self Development, creative, realizations, show thoughts, thinking
Mon, 19 Jan 2015 05:31:36 +0000
Aside from the obvious reason people love to shower, it’s the perfect “me” time. When you’re in the shower alone, you shed off your inhibitions. You can bust a move that you’ll never do in public. You can sing a full playlist to your heart’s content without the ribbing you usually get from friends. You can light a candle and let the water wash out both your physical and emotional dirt. And in the shower, you get the weirdest or the most fascinating ideas. Showering is usually when light-bulb moments happen. It’s not unheard of that an owner of a big business got the idea for his product while showering. Musicians usually formulate song lyrics and melodies when they’re alone in the bathroom. Even students practice their speeches while taking a bath. The tranquility of shower time clears the mind. It doesn’t matter if what you’ve thought is weird, funny, gross, naughty, heartbreaking or philosophical. When the thought or idea came from your “me” time in the shower, It’s usually entertaining or creative enough to put into action or share with family and friends. The online world is brimming with collections of funny, creative and inspirational thoughts and ideas that people thought while showering. Some are as witty as: Ellen DeGeneres gives gifts and surprises every day she should just change her name to Ellen DeGenerous. iPhone chargers should be called ‘Apple’ juice. Using your old computer to search for a new device you’ll buy is like asking your PC to dig its own grave. Or as thoughtful as: A pizza’s shape is round. It’s delivered in a box. And you cut it into triangles. Your tombstone’s epitaph is like your final status update. Have you ever wondered what your pet named you? Shower thoughts, even trivial ones, can make your day and inspire you to do more, encourage you to be more creative or just make you laugh silly. So the next time you take a shower, why don’t you take notice of what comes to your mind? In the meantime take a look at other people’s intriguing realizations. 1. Maybe ‘Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader?’ isn’t a show that displays how stupid grown adults can be, but rather, a show that depicts how much useless information we teach grade schoolers that won’t be retained or applicable later in life. – YELLHEAH 2. Every time you upvote someone on Reddit, you are making their day better, at the cost of nothing. – andrew688k 3. X88B88 looks like the word voodoo reflecting off of itself. – roboccohurly 4. “Go to bed, you’ll feel better in the morning” is the human version of “Did you turn it off and turn it back on again?” – W0rdN3rd 5. The person who would proof read Hitler’s speeches was a grammar Nazi. – PhantomDukie 6. When you drink alcohol you are just borrowing happiness from tomorrow – benji9t3 7. The Google self-driving car should have an “I’m Feeling Lucky” button that drives you to a random location. – CerealFlakes 8. As a dishwasher, I come home after hours of work in which I get covered in filth, and I take a shower only to realize…I am the final dish – RandyJones 9. I wish I had a Mario Kart-like ghost of myself punctually getting ready for work in the morning so I’d know if I was running late. – OMGGGEEEE 10. The iconic Alien is to us what we are to apes: small, pale, big headed, and with unfathomable technology. We even abduct them for medical experiments. – Deejer 11. Trying to get rich by playing the lottery is like trying to commit suicide by flying on commercial airlines. – H3llShadow 12. Thanks to the Internet, I have probably seen more naked ladies than all of my ancestors combined. – CurtisTH 13. The word “Fat” just looks like someone took a bite out of the first letter of the word “Eat.” – dunkm1n 14. Your stomach thinks all potato is mashed. – MayoFetish 15. Your shadow is a confirmation that light has traveled nearly 93 million miles unobstructed, only to be deprived of reaching the ground in the final few feet thanks to you. – tectactoe 16. Google maps should have a “on the way” feature to find the most convenient gas station, Starbucks, or whatever along the route to your destination. – joebobmcgeeman 17. I bet attractive people think the world is a lot more polite than it really is. – shicky536 18. When a pregnant woman swims, she is a human submarine. – heavywafflezombie 19. Mars…is populated entirely by robots! – aaqucnaona 20. I wonder if there are any times on the clock that I have never seen. – h1ghdeaz 21. Newborns are always crying because any discomfort is literally one of the worst things they have ever experienced. – TheHowardEffect 22. Pornography is the only profession where amateur products can be in higher demand than professional ones. – Unidan 23. If you’re no longer covered by your parent’s health insurance, your manufacturer’s warranty is over. – hexagonz 24. If two people on opposite sides of the world each drop a piece of bread, the Earth briefly becomes a sandwich. – nklotz 25. Seeing as how both Batman and Ironman’s only real super powers are that they are super rich and very smart, Bill Gates and Steve Jobs sure turned out to be disappointments. – ImmaculateJones 26. When Sweden is playing Denmark, it is SWE-DEN. The remaining letters, not used, is DEN-MARK. – vestergaard92 27. If Hillary Clinton wins in 2016, it will be the first time that two presidents have had sex with each other. – AlibiBreakfast 28. Asking someone “where are you” is a recent thing. Before we had mobile phones, the only way we could talk to people is if we knew where they were. – saint1997 29. If you would mount garbage trucks with camera’s you could weekly update google maps street view. – impreson 30. For most of human history, vehicles had automatic collision avoidance and could even take you home when you were sleeping or drunk. Then we got rid of the horse. – arbaminim 31. There should be an optional “people are sleeping” button on the microwave so stop from all the extra loud beeping. – Idontfeellikedancing 32. Using your old laptop to research buying a new one is like asking it to dig its own grave. – WorthierCaptor 33. Most teenagers pull their phones out of their pockets to check the time. We are reverting to the era of pocket watches. – SirTickleTots 34. If you view a bald eagle at the zoo, you are looking at the American symbol of freedom in captivity. – keytarin 35. When you say the word “crisp”, it moves from the back of your mouth to the front as you say it. – ReddyAmyFire 36. If I touch my phone in the right places, a pizza will show up at my front door. – drunk_bird 37. Over time, the insult “two dollar whore” has become progressively more offensive. – apocalypsemeow111 38. Rap songs that reference dollar values won’t adjust for inflation and the references will sound cheaper over time. – sagrr 39. There is no time I have ever thought, ‘Oh awesome, iTunes opened itself.’ – loveCards 40. We will never hear about the truly perfect crime. – Cleffer 41. 1/3 of marriages are now from online dating and that number is only increasing. That means that computers (algorithms) are starting to breed humans. – fleetw16 42. Killing a spider makes the spider genetic pool sneakier and more deadly. – godspeedmetal 43. If we pop bubble wrap made in China, the air that comes out is from China. – Shadows4 44. When the North Korean citizens finally get freedom of information and internet they’re going to realize the whole world was making fun of their country. – DanTheManVan 45. What if the lottery is an Institution to catch Time Travelers? – imverykind 46. Lobsters are mermaids to scorpions. – rrtaylor 47. If job ads say “must be fluent in Mandarin” why don’t they post the entire ad in Mandarin, that way only genuinely fluent people could apply? – Scamwau 48. Once you have a PhD, every meeting you go to becomes a doctor’s appointment. – Sland 49. Some rappers basically have us pay them to tell us what extravagant/lavish things they then do with our money. – dafunkmasta 50. They should make a Shazam for bird calls where it identifies the kind of bird making the call. – khklann